Šale voditelja Oscara

Piše: Sven Mikulec

13. Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie ladies and gentlemen. I don’t actually have a joke for them I’m just contractually obligated to mention their names five times during the show.

Hugh Jackman (2009.)

12. Julie Christie was absolutely amazing in Away From Her. Brilliant movie. It was the moving story of a woman who forgets her own husband. Hillary Clinton calls it the feel good movie of the year.

Jon Stewart (2008.)

11. The winners will of course take home an Oscar, the losers will all be presented with do it yourself suicide kits.

Bob Hope (1955.)

10. Meryl Streep holds the record for most nominations as an actress. Or as I like to think of it, most losses.

Steve Martin (2003.)

9. A lot of british nominees, a lot. Would I say too many? Not here, no.

Ellen Degeneres (2007.)

8. Not all films did as well as Juno obviously. The films that were made about the Iraq war, let’s face it, did not do as well. But I’m telling you, if we stay the course and keep these movies in the theatres we can turn this around. I don’t care if it takes 100 years. Withdrawing the Iraq movies would only embolden the audience. We cannot let the audience win.

Jon Stewart (2008.)

7. That’s interesting, if Tom wins tonight, that means that between Tom and myself we will have three best actor awards.

Steve Martin (2003.)

6. It was 13 years ago when I first hosted the Academy Awards, and things sure have changed since then. George Bush was President, the economy was tanking, and we had just finished a war with Iraq. Yeah, things really have changed.

Billy Crystal

5. For  me, hosting the Oscars is a lot like making love to a woman: I only ever get to do it when Billy Crystal is out of town.

Steve Martin (2003.)

4. Nothing takes the sting out of these tough economic times like watching a bunch of millionaires giving golden statues to each other.

Billy Crystal (2012.)

3. Most people dream of winning an Academy Award, I had a dream of actually hosting it.
So, let that be a lesson to you kids out there. Aim lower.

Ellen Degeneres (2007.)

2. Anyone who has ever worked with Meryl Streep always ends up saying the exact same thing –
can that woman act and what’s up with all the Hitler memorabilia?

Steve Martin (2003.)

1. In Inglourious Basterds, Christoph Waltz played a Nazi obsessed with finding Jews. Well, Christoph… the mother lode.

Steve Martin (2010.)

Jedan komentar za “Šale voditelja Oscara

  • Duke28 says:

    Nothing takes the sting out of these tough economic times like watching a bunch of millionaires giving golden statues to each other.

    ova je najbolja 😀

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